cherchez la femme

[consecrates]

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[untie]

There's a possibility I might.

[ he'll only do 50% of that. wear a blue tie here, a red shirt there. the world is lucky dick can never find his hairbrush. ]

[consecrates]

You are making me want to say yes just to see it happen, you know.

[ davina now knows what to get him for christmas. ]

[untie]

[ the thing is, he would make it happen. robin may beat up the mean, but he also gives to those who deserve to be given to. if that's him wearing primary colours, well ... not all heroes wear capes. ]

What's preventing you from committing to that answer? Maybe I can help.

[consecrates]

You can't.
Because I like you better in dark colors, that's what.
Even though I know it's probably encouraging you to brood.

[ and honestly, imagining the hair curl on him is making her burst out in terrible laughter. ]

[untie]

[ dick smiles. broodily, of course. ]

What would you do if I did wear bright colors?

[consecrates]

I will take a photo for posterity and make sure I have a copy of it saved somewhere.
Just in case it doesn't happen again and you need me to remind you about it.

[untie]

Do you have a Dick album on your phone?

[consecrates]

[ it's really only a matter of time, with a name like his ]

You know, I actually do.
And it's a pretty large and extensive collection.
Wanna see it?

[untie]

[ how many of those photos are actually not of dick grayson? stop taking the piss out of him! ]

Is my selfie in there?

[consecrates]

[ they're all his photos, c'mon. whatever selfie or candid shot she could manage to take with him, anyway. she's not like him, wow. ]

Don't you want to find out for yourself?

[untie]

[ she really, really likes him. ]

Tonight? You find out if my chest and abs are impressive, and I get to see your Dick album.

We're going to need appropriate food. Italian? Chinese? Nearest fast food restaurant?

[ this is going to make it into their wedding vows, isn't it? ]

[consecrates]

[ ssh, she's still in the third stage of bargaining. ]

What's the nearest fast food restaurant?

Oh, and just a fair warning: I hope you prepare yourself to get blown away by the album's contents as well.

[ sharing is caring is def going to be a part of their wedding vows. ]

[untie]

[ DAVINA CLAIRE LIKES — ]

McDonald's. Starbucks. Pizza Hut. Subway. Really prized places. 5 star reviews promise it's like cooking in your own home.

Thanks for the warning. I'll make sure I'm very prepared, and if I'm not, at least I have your shoulder to cry on.

[consecrates]

[ the stage of depression hasn't set in yet, hold on ]

Right, well.
I'm not sure how your heart can endure all of those great places so I'll drop by the supermarket and pick up a few items instead.

I'll get you a box of Kleenex too, just in case.

[untie]

[ ftr, her future husband can cook. he just hasn't had time due to cosplaying at night. don't let this dock a point! ]

That's very considerate of you, thank you. I honestly don't know what I'd do without you.

Where are you planning on taking these few items? Your place? Mine?

[consecrates]

[ he needs to quit while he's ahead. ]

You would probably be living a sullen, moody life, lacking colour and happiness.
Like even more sullen and moody than right now.

How functional is your kitchen? Honest question.

[untie]

The cupboard doors open. I think.

[ and he knows what a cupboard is!

in all seriousness, though: ]

I know how to use the stove, and you'll find there's some leftovers that prove that I can cook.

[consecrates]

[ she has trust issues and sometimes, he's the reason for those issues. ]

My kitchen it is, then.
I don't want to accidentally set your place on fire because we're both not sure which stuff works and which doesn't.

I guess I don't have to ask if you drink, right?
I mean, you're a detective and this is like a given.

[untie]

[ HIS KITCHEN WORKS. just wait for the second date. it'll blow her mind how good he looks working a kitchen. ]

I drink. I know, it's a stereotype, but I've come to accept it.

So, am I allowed to touch anything in your kitchen or am I expected to the stand to the side and look pretty?

[consecrates]

[ she needs proof first that it works ]

I only have beer so if you want something fancier, you'll have to bring it yourself.

And as long as you're aware that you're not supposed to run around while carrying a knife, then I suppose you're allowed to help.

[untie]

Wait. You mean, I don't run around while carrying a knife? I can't believe I've been doing this all wrong.

[consecrates]

Isn't this taught at the police academy?
Or whatever school detectives go to.

[untie]

I might've skipped that day.

[ amongst many other things, including not knowing how to not brood. ]

It's a good thing I have you to teach me, and just in the nick of time.

[consecrates]

[ you'd think batdad sent him to the best schools with his money ]

Nick of time, as in you thankfully haven't stabbed anyone yet while on duty?

[untie]

I came close once, but my quick reflexes saved the day. It's why I'm the number one detective in the precinct.

[ robin, on the other hand ... never invite that guy over to cook. ]

You'll be safe. I promise.